This was a tough week

Thursday the 15th Kevin's father-in-law took his life and threw the family into a spin. He was only 46 and had much family and a profusion of friends who will miss him. I volunteered to create the bonuses that have become a common part of a service, a fitting card, picture DVD and then a CD of special songs to play at the reception afterward. Other family members helped out with the food and drinks, babysitting, etc. Our family (Dale, Denny, Rach and spouses and myself) pooled together to buy a beautiful large arrangement that ended up being the centerpiece at the service, front and center, right behind Phil's photo. Phil was working for an excavation company, Donovan Excavating, and they drove their fleet of trucks out of the parking lot with horns blaring in a tribute to Phil that left not one dry eye in the whole place. As I was creating the slideshow I learned a lot about him and his wife, Mindy. The most painful thing I learned is that they had been together since they were teenagers and stuck it out all the way into Grandparent-hood. They grew up together. Mindy will have to learn how to live without Phil, the man she was with 75% of her life. It'll take many years. Right now the plans are for her and Kevin & Shirley to buy a place together with a mother-in-law apartment or house of some sort so she won't be alone. Those grandbabies will help keep her occupied. Speaking of grandbabies, Joe is less than 2 and so is not cognizant of what has happened, yet, when he picked up one of the memorial cards with Grandpa Phil's face on the front he got melancholy and laid his head on whomever it was that was near him. He somehow knows that Grandpa's gone, probably because Grandma's there without him and everyone is so sad.

That's what has consumed all my energy for the last week and now I'll have to just get on with my life again. It's amazing how the loss of someone whom we aren't even close to can have such a strong effect on us, due mostly to the effect that we see it have on our loved ones. When our kids or friends hurt, we hurt.